Schnibber on Solarise Records

Independent record label for music and film

Big Brush Films
Schnibber

Cat No. - Film1
UK / 2003 £5
DV / 16 mins, 40 secs
Stereo All Regions

More Film Info

Big Brush Films present

SCHNIBBER

A short film written and  directed by Mark Withers

Cyril Dubergh is a good looking young bachelor. However, Cyril is obsessed, to the point of distraction, by the size of his nose. As doctor�s have pointed out, its dimensions are by no means greater than the average sized nose and fits perfectly well in proportion to the rest of his facial features. But Cyril sees things differently.

Cyril dreams that his nose is licked and sucked by a beautiful female mouth.
Waking up, a medieval face brace is strapped tightly around his head and pushes down on his nose, to stump any potential growth in the night.
After removing the face brace, the blood flows back into his nose and Cyril makes notes on a chart, detailing his noses apparent growth. Cyril disguises the size of his nose as best as he can with the use of make-up and spectacles sitting low down on the bridge.
Fortunately, his job allows him to wear a face mask, hiding his �hideous� features. Cyril unenthusiastically cleans out recreational park �dog waste� bins.

Making a regular visit to the doctor�s, again Cyril is advised that no such cosmetic surgery will be available to him, as his entire face is just fine, although psychiatric advice could be sought.
Exiting, Cyril finds a bottle of morphine with a needle and syringe in an open store cupboard.

At home, Cyril decides that if medical science will not put right his �disability�, he�ll perform the procedure himself and injects morphine into his nose. As it begins to kick in, Cyril takes a scalpel and slices down on the marker pen lines drawn along his nose.
He feints.

In the park, Cyril clears out dog waste bins. A pretty dog walking lady approaches and offers him her plastic bag of dog waste. Removing his mask to accept, the pretty lady is suddenly in awe of Cyril�s �perfect� nose, as a beam of light bounces off it and she leaps at him, kissing hard on his nose.
Falling down whilst still kissing, carrier bags containing dog waste �romantically� begin to rain down from sky, just before the pretty lady  rips open her dress top�

Cyril wakes up on his bathroom floor, the scalpel imbedded in his bloody nose. 
He stands and cleans himself up, before slowly peering into the mirror.
The operation is a success! He has the perfect nose and for the first time smiles.
But then something else, more worrying, grabs his attention. 
His ears. He�s never noticed before, they�re huge!

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